What's Been "H"appening 08/01/04
by Dick Scalpone, AGWA-Illinois Chapter H

Hi all,
Wasn't Sunday a most gorgeous day?  There was plenty of sun shine and blue skies.  The weather was a little warm and humid, but nonetheless, it was a motorcyclist's delight.  The weatherman sure did cooperate with us. 
It was a great day for our annual picnic, held at Christine and sir Malcolm Irwin's house, who were gracious enough to host this great social event.
Some of the chapter rough riders who met at Mickey D's on this fine day were; lucky Larry Greco, Fritz Goins, jumpin Joe Hughes, sergeant Russ Prichard, whispering Joe Mendoza, dancing Dick Sieple, fast Eddie Bowser, doctor Cary Levin and gentleman George Riebesehl.  Yours truly was not able to attend this ride. 
The rough riders took of for "Star 34" restaurant in Sandwich, ILL.  Fritz lead the group and sergeant Russ did is usual fine job of sweep.  The route that they embarked on was a long slow twisting, with many dipsy-do's, so that their ponies would receive much needed exercise.
Needless to say, we all rendezvoused at the Irwin's house for our annual chapter H picnic about 1300hrs.  Let the socializing begin.  The group that attended were; lucky Larry & Nancy Greco, wimpy Lester & Beverly Chapman, doctor Cary & Miss Kitty with their children, Matt, Ben and Russell, also in attendance were Ken Kaya & Lorri Berthelot, dancing Dick Sieple, sergeant Russ Prichard, jumpin Joe Hughes, thundering Mark & sweet Paulette Brenton, professor Damien & Karen Shelton with their daughter Becky, major Dan & Karen Harris, trusty Bruce Hirsch and yours truly with wife JoAnn.
What a great chit chatting session we all had.  The shenanigans will now commence. Major Dan had to impress everyone with his new version of "The Herky Jerk", his wife Karen, was really impressed.  She informed me that she was unaware of major Dan's talents. The applause lasted for more than 5 minutes.  Sir Malcolm was the chef for today.  His cooking was outstanding, everything was cooked to perfection.  We all brought a dish to pass and the vittles were the finest, bon appetit.  Naturally, our hostess set up the croquet set.  I politely informed everyone that I have not lost in croquet in 35 years.  So our hostess eagerly set up teams who would play against each other.  Unfortunately, wimpy Les and I drew against each other.  He was bound and determined NOT to lose to me.  Before the games commenced, wimpy Les had several practice session to sharpen his skills.  He would not give me the opportunity to practice, I had to go in cold turkey.  Nonetheless, he did beat me at my own game.  Wimpy Les was bellowing from ear to ear on how great he was.  He said, "I am the best, the heck with the rest".  Afterwards, the play-offs started, and wouldn't you know it, wimpy Les played Miss Kitty for the championship of chapter H, and won, but just by a hair, or in this case, a stroke.  He received a trophy for first place and Miss Kitty received a second place trophy as presented by our hostess Christine. 
As the chit chatting and socializing continued in a heavy way, our hostess and trusty Bruce were singing songs and playing their guitars.  They were very entertaining and did a darn good job.  I was ready to get out the contracts and sign them up for a recording session. 
By this time, vittles were served.  The food was delicious and plentiful.  The desserts were scrumptious and very tasty.  No body walked away hungry. 
It is at this time that our host, sir Malcolm brought out the Bocce Ball set.  Jumpin Joe, sir Malcolm, doctor Cary and your truly jumped at the chance to play this game.  As the crowds gather around, there was a still in the air, for this became an intense shoot out.  The strategy was cooking.  The game was wild and wooly, security had to be called to maintain control.  This was a moment of reckoning, for now, the championship was on the line.  Jumpin Joe took the lead and I was coming up fast behind him, with sir Malcolm and doctor Cary bring up the rear.  We played to a total of 6 points for the AGWA championship.  Jumpin Joe and I were neck and neck with 5 points each.  Sir Malcolm and doctor Cary were far behind.  At this point, the crowd became silent as jumpin Joe pitched his two Bocce balls and got real close to the chase ball.  Sir Malcolm and doctor Cary shot, but to no avail, were strictly out classed.  My turn......   I took aim, set myself, and pitched as I never pitched before.  My first ball was close, but not close enough, my second chance became useless.  I was wide right, and not even close.  The crowd let out a roar and jumpin Joe took the crown of Bocce ball champion.
I was close, ever so close, but to no avail, jumpin Joe was hot and did not miss a shot.  Needless to say, I will never live this defeat down.  Wimpy Les and jumpin Joe will always remind me of how they kick my butt.
Wait 'til next year, was my cry, to the victors, because pay back is sure to come.
All in all folks, this was a fine day for a picnic.  The weather was perfect and the camaraderie was superb.  It just does not get any better than this.  How sweet it is!!
So until next week, happy trails to you all, and may you all have a excellent week.
The unruly rep,